Friday, November 23, 2012

This *is* the 21st century... right??

Happy Black Friday!!! It is by far my second favorite holiday in the world! (not a real holiday? Please! Any day that is specifically ALL ABOUT SHOPPING, is a holiday;) Chris and I managed to snag the last Nikon Coolpix L310 from Target around 2 this morning! It was HALF OFF!! We are super excited about having a more "grown up" camera than our last one to capture all of Baby's most precious moments! (Yes, it's still technically a "point and shoot" BUT it looks and feels like a *real camera* so I still feel more grown up. lol)

Anyway, after taking a nap from all the shopping, I decided to log on to my old friend and check out Mommy groups. I don't have a lot of Mommy friends in the area, and thought it would be fun to get to know some other women and get Baby D socialized (trying to plan ahead here!;)

It was a complete failure. Every group within a 25 mile radius of my zip code was for stay-at-home moms. So, of course, most of their outings/activities are during the day.

Now, not that I don't love SAHMs! My mom was one, Chris's mom was one, I'd love to be one... you know, if money weren't a necessity, lol. But at this point, I'll be returning to work a couple months after Baby's arrival and Chris will be the stay-at-home parent (and I honestly have mixed feelings about him joining a "mommy" group...)

The whole purpose of my title is just that I'm so shocked. Like, this isn't 1950 anymore where everyone's mom is June Cleaver (ah, but what a world that would be;) so what are other working moms doing?? Just not making friends? Letting their babies socialize at day care? Do they already have a strong support network of other mom friends? (I'd find that one hard to believe because, if this is indeed the 21st century, which I'm *pret-ty* sure it is, people are moving more now than in any generation before! Except for maybe during Oregon Trail days when everyone was going out west.) [No. I have no statistical data to back up any of those last statements. Just trust me on this one;)]

And yes, I *could* start my own group, 'cause I imagine we can't be the only working mom/SAHD combination, I'm just not sure I'm ready for another added responsibility... Has anyone else had issues like this? Trying to find where you fit in?


Thursday, November 22, 2012

A Thankful Heart

So! Here we are at 23 and a half weeks! I feel like the pregnancy is speeding up!! And while I am super excited to get to finally meet Baby D, I'm just not quite ready yet!!

Anyway, being that it's Thanksgiving Day here in the US, I've decided to write a quick post about things I'm thankful for (specifically with my lot in life right now;) and give you some updates!

First and foremost, I am super thankful for this little boy growing inside me! If you had asked me this time last year (or heck, even if you'd asked me early this past summer) if I thought I'd be a mommy, I probably would've laughed at you and made some smart comment about how, no, never, not for me, etc. LOL Ah, how things can change.

I'm thankful Baby D has been growing and developing properly--that he passed all the genetic testing with flying colors, that his heart beat is always strong, that his kicks and movements are getting stronger. (To the point where now, I can actually SEE him moving. Okay, that kinda freaks me out, but it's comforting to know he's still there!) Also, this week, since his hearing is even stronger now, the past couple days when my alarm goes off in the morning (yes, it's loud. Yes, I snooze it. Yes, I have a hard time getting up lol) as soon as he hears it, he starts moving!! Not a little--like a lot! Like he's saying, "Okay, Mom! Time to get up! Let's do this!!" (or he's just freaked out with the alarm, hard to say;)

I'm thankful my health has been good during the pregnancy! There's been no vomiting or low iron or any scary things. The heartburn has been getting pretty bad--no matter what I eat (or don't eat) or when or how many Tums I take, etc. It's more annoying than anything else. And this week, I've started to get hip pain while I sleep. First it was just my left side, so I could roll to my right and be fine--last night my right side started hurting too. I've also started to become a bit emotional... commercials make me cry. Everything makes me cry. These are all such minor things though, so I'm still thankful for such a great pregnancy!

I'm thankful for my job--both the money and flexibility it provides so I can make it to all my doctor appointments! Also, for my insurance! I don't know how some women do it with no or little insurance; I am so blessed to having paid for nothing so far!

I'm thankful for my friends--especially those who are already first time mommies--who have given me so much support; answering my questions (no matter how silly) and offering encouraging and straight talk advice anytime I want it. I'm pretty sure, I'd be lost without you (yes, Andrea, this means you;)

Finally (and most imporantly?) I'm thankful for Chris, my DH. I know throughout the blog so far, I was referring to him just as "Daddy," but that is too close to "Baby Daddy" which kinda seems impersonal. lol. Without him, clearly I wouldn't be pregnant, hahahaa. But he has been sooo super supportive and helpful with this entire process! I probably would've lost my mind in the beginning when those two lines showed up if it weren't for his level-headedness. Even now when I become overwhelmed or stressed or totally freaked out, it's he who talks me off the ledge and reminds me that everything is going to be okay! I'm also thankful for his family (especially his mom and sister) who are ensuring Baby D will never not have enough clothing;)

And it could go without saying (and this could offend you, but sorry! My blog!;) I am especially thankful to God, who even though I've made a number of mistakes in my life, He continues to forgive and bless me.

In other baby news, I'm up 13 pounds now (feels like a LOT more). It's almost all in my tummy! Still no real cravings (kinda bummed about that. I thought I'd want something craaazy lol).

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!!!


Sunday, November 11, 2012

Learning to Love

Sometimes I think we are pregnant for nine ten months because for some of us, it takes time to adjust to the idea that we're going to be mothers. Plus there is so much to learn about being a mother! Ten months is not enough time to get a degree or even a certificate in mommy'ing!

People always say there's "mother's instinct" or like some sixth sense that you have that just kicks in when you have a baby.  I feel like this is a topic that's too risky to just leave to what people say... So I'm doing my own research!
This is the stack of books I'm working on! I'm honestly overwhelmed when I start to think of all the things I don't know! Will I *really* be able to tell the difference between an "I'm hungry" cry and an "I need to be changed" cry? How do I balance work, family, baby, and a life? I feel like I don't have enough time to do everything I want to do now, so what happens when I'm on even less sleep and there's a BABY in the picture?? It's a scary thought!

I'm more than halfway done with Hello, My Name is Mommy: The Dysfunctional Girl's Guide to Having, Loving (and Hopefully Not Screwing Up) a Baby by Sheri Lynch. I plan to write a whole review on it when I'm done (the other books as well), but just from what I've read so far, I do feel like I'm more confident. Like I'm ready for Baby D to get here and just do this mommy-thing! Maybe it's bad to say, but other pregnant girls I see (and other moms I know) I can't help but tell my self, "I will be such a better mother than SHE is/will be." And maybe that's a horrible thing to think, but just look at the news--there are terribly, horrible, no good mothers out there--I've gotta be better than they are ;)
Even after I read all these books, there's one thing I've realized that is not learned--that's the love for the child. Baby D has only been with me for 22 weeks (and five of those, I didn't even know he existed!) and already I love him sosososososososoooo much! Like words cannot even describe what I would give/do/sacrifice for this little boy. I'd heard other women talk about it before, but it was something I couldn't even comprehend until I experienced it myself. And honestly, it's probably going to get a gazillion times stronger when I actually hold him in my arms and see his teeny-tiny fingers and toes and his little button nose... I still can't quite fathom what that feeling will be like.

Nearly every other person in our lives, we've "learned to love"... or we've "grown to love"... but without knowing ANYTHING about this little person inside of me (other than he moves around A LOT lol) I *know* 100% without a doubt that I absolutely love him. It's the most wonderful feeling in the world! And I cannot wait for that feeling to grow!
I pretty much feel like I've doubled in size...
Speaking of growing, I'm up about eleven pounds now... Still not horrible, but if I were to follow the nurse practitioner's guidance and only gain twenty pounds (thanks to my apparent obesity), I'm pretty much screwed. I think as long as I stay around 30-35, I'll still be okay. Next appointment will be the glucose screening *gag* so maybe that'll determine how much I can actually gain;) lol.


Saturday, November 3, 2012

The moment of truth... BOY?? or GIRL???

So! Yesterday was our BIG ANATOMY SCAN!!! **insert ominous music here** I drank two bottles of water and some apple juice before/on the way to the appointment! I took the "arrive with a full bladder" guidance very seriously and was hoping a little sugar would encourage Baby to move around and show us the goods!;)

Let me pause the story here for a moment: on most weekdays, I get up around 5ish and to work around 6:20ish. At this point, Baby is usually moving a little and by 7:30/8:00am, Baby is wiggling like a crazy person--it was especially this way on Thursday so I *expected* Baby would do the same thing on Friday! NOT SO. This little thing barely even woke up in time for the ultrasound. *sigh* Question to other moms: does my schedule actually affect Baby's schedule? On doctor day, I didn't get up 'til 7:30 so maybe he/she was confused?? lol I don't know. Back to the story!!

So we get to the ultrasound room and the technician asks if we want to know the sex of the Baby. My head was screaming "YES YES!! WHY ELSE DO YOU THINK WE'RE HERE?!?!?!" but  I calmly said, "yes, if you can find it." On went the goo and her first words were, "Well, Baby is breeched, but that's okay for now." Baby. is. breeched. My little wiggle worm who is always moving around? The one thing I sweetly requested he/she not be is breeched (okay, yes, we were talking more during labor, but I thought Baby got the jist of it).  She moved around... found the head.. the brain.. the heart... "127" she said. I knew. I knew right then what Baby was. (okay, I don't buy into ALLLL the wives tails, BUT on this one, I swear, I JUST KNEW). We got a perfect shot of Baby's foot.. and later I could see the arm reaching out and the teeny tiny hand!
The whole thing was going on for a while (which, I'm not complaining; while I can't understand a lot of what's on the screen, I could watch Baby alllll daaayyyy lonnnng). Finally, she said the words we'd been waiting to hear:

"It's a boy!"

I hadn't seen any BOY PARTS so I wanted to ask her, "are you sure??" (though, reminder, because the heart rate was below 140, I *knew* it was a boy;) Then there he was in all his glory... a perfect shot of his little tiny testicles... HAHAHAH
A boy. Wow. Throughout this pregnancy, I really thought he was a boy (yay! Mommy is always right!;) but all those "gender predictor" quizzes online told me girl. Even the Chinese predictor said girl! But he is all boy! And I'm actually super excited! I know a lot of people were worried about me--since I'm so girly everyone was saying how great it would be if I had a girl (and yes, any girl of mine would be all dolled up ALL THE TIME lol), but I was so nervous if it were a girl--how do I talk to her about periods? And boobies and bras? And boys?? OMG. Thankfully, since it's a boy, all that talk will be done by Daddy. lol.

Now I can't wait for my house to be full of Tonka trucks and Hot Wheels and Thomas the Tank Engine lol. Daddy said we're going to have Baby dressed in suits all the time--like Barney Stinson from "How I Met Your Mother" hahhahah, we'll see:)

P.S. Baby is already above average! He weighs A POUND!! That's SIXTEEN OUNCES!!! Most babies at 20 weeks are around TEN OUNCES. Well... at least this means he's eating well, right? I'm doing a good job taking care of him so far... unless this is the first sign of childhood obesity! OMG, off to worry some more...